Friday, April 27, 2018

I recapped elsewhere but forgot to actually update here! Oops! Here's Tuesday's update:

Today was a GREAT ride!


Whatever the "something" in the air was yesterday, everything was fine this morning and the mare was back to her usual self. I lunged her first just to see if she had any reaction to the door and she didn't care a bit.


She was well warmed up from the lunging, so I mainly focused on canter work. She's an older horse and had gotten a little out of shape last year, but this winter she's put on lots of muscle and is looking fantastic. "The best she's looked in a few years" according to her owner, so that's great to hear. As she's gotten stronger she's had more balance and stamina in the canter. I did a pattern each direction: one full lap, then a second lap with a 15m circle at the top, a 20m circle in the centre, and a 15m circle at the far end. She nailed it and sustained the canter throughout. I also did some pretty tight trot serpentines to keep her moving through those turns.


My canter seat has really improved with the amount of riding I've been doing lately. Whereas even a couple weeks ago, I had a bit of bounce one way, I'm actually able to sit deep and stay there both ways now, most of the time.


And here's today's:

Today's ride was pretty okay? I was in a wretched mood today, and unfortunately I have trouble leaving Life Stuff outside of the riding ring. Even if I'm able to push it away mentally, it creates tension in my body and things just don't feel quite right. Even if I'm technically riding fine, I feel "off." Today was one of those. Plus I hadn't ridden since Tuesday, and even though two days of not riding would have sounded like nothing to me before, I've ridden so much lately that it felt like "time off" that I didn't really want to take.

And from a technical perspective, today I really wasn't quite as "fine" as usual. My sitting trot, which has been improving lately, was so stiff I could actually feel myself catching air time in the saddle. Not good. I was able to use the muscles in my seat and thighs to cushion the blows so I wasn't actually thumping the horse hard in the back, but having to do that also interfered with softly following with my seat, so it became a bit of a vicious loop.

My canter seat was following fine though, and staying soft and active, which was interesting. The canter work was decent today, if very pokey, but she STAYED in canter (with one notable exception that I'll describe further on). My upwards transitions were a bit messy. I did both trot to canter and walk to canter. She would lift her front end nicely to step under, and at the same moment I'd be caught leaning forward and the reins would go slack for that first moment. Not particularly elegant, but I was fine every time once we were actually IN canter. Really need to work on those upwards transitions. Our downwards transitions have been great -- probably aided by her tendency to want to poke along lately. :/ 

I had lunged her first, in some elastic side reins as she tends to sort of shuffle along and not carry herself well if she isn't given some incentive now and then. But I think what limited energy she had today was spent before I got on her. She's been in heat all week, and AGGRESSIVELY sidling up to the boys in the paddock! I think by today it had taken a lot out of her. Still, even though she wasn't forward in her gaits, she STAYED in them quite well for the most part.

I did have one moment of "Oh no you DIDN'T!!" with her. Often, in the first bit of canter, she'll have to tug her head down to get a good cough or two out of her system, and then she's good to go. (Just an allergy thing that crops up sometimes, and exercise seems to set her off a bit.) And even though she had gotten some of her coughs out on the lunge today, I felt her suddenly plunge down during one of our first canters of the ride, so I let the reins slip so she could cough it out... And there was NO cough!!! She punked me! Reefed the reins right out of my hands and dropped into a sedate trot. SMART horse! If that's her being "naughty" then I'm very, very lucky to be riding such a nice horse! ;) And I am!

Today was my last ride up at the winter barn with the nice indoor arena, before they're moved back home for the season. I won't be able to ride nearly as much now, but I have come away from this winter a much better, stronger rider -- today's stiff ride aside. (I really do wish today's ride had been another AMAZING ride like Tuesday's but we all have our days!) And it's made me a better horse person, with all the handling and feeding I've done over this winter. It's been really lovely, as much as it's also been very hard work. I'll miss it, but I'll also enjoy having my mornings back!

Monday, April 23, 2018

Not my best ride this morning. Not my worst, but still, one of those kind of "off" days.

Things didn't start out too well when my car wouldn't start because my partner had been dinking around with the headlights last night, and didn't periodically start it to keep the battery charged. So we had to find someone to give us a boost, and I got to the barn late and irritated.

When I got on the horse, I had a weird case of nerves. And I think I jinxed myself last night. I was reflecting on how my riding has been going lately, and feeling pleased about how much my confidence has improved and how I'm much better at visualizing successful rides instead of conjuring up all the ways I *could* possibly have a wreck.

Getting self-congratulatory is apparently a good way to remind your subconscious that it isn't done with you yet. As soon as I was on her, my brain started to picture ways things could go south. Great.

Did I mention this horse is solid and not spooky 99.87% of the time? I've had ONE spooky day on her, back in the fall, where it was way too much for me and I did think I was going to take a spill. That was a cold, noisy, windy day with random HUGE gusts blowing through the arena and rattling the trees and gates, though. And I should have lunged her first but I was too lazy to go back to the barn for the equipment. I digress...

Today, things started out steady as usual, but on one of our 20m canter circles, she decided she had a problem one direction with the sliding door that goes out to the back paddock. She did those straight-ahead "radar ears" at it, and cut in on that side of the circle to avoid it and was blowing off my aids and turning her head out to look at it. Great. I took her around two more times with the same result, and she cut in to avoid it MORE rather than less. Not what I needed on a day where I was already feeling tense. You can tell I've been spoiled by how easy this horse normally is -- and how off I was already today -- when THAT is enough to make me feel threatened. I stopped trying the large canter circles beside it and did smaller trot circles. She was mostly fine, but not TOTALLY fine, and I moved on to other things to get both our minds off it.

Amusingly, she was fine going right past it along the track, but any angle I took that had her approaching it where she was looking directly at it, I got the EARS and the little OMG from her. Made me wonder if something was out there. I tried a four-loop serpentine at the pokiest ever trot, and she still was not cool going towards it. She had a couple small "moments" that probably looked like nothing, but I could feel them. After I'd put in a decent workout on her I stopped things for the day.

Nothing "happened," and I think she and I actually both went pretty well otherwise. When I'm nervous the tension does affect my riding, though, and I tend to tip a bit, tighten a bit, and my one shoulder that likes to pop up and forward on me goes there and wants to stay there. I'm also now switching up my saddle, back and forth between a dressage saddle and a new GP one so I don't get "spoiled" by the dressage saddle, but I do feel less secure in the GP that I used today.

Over all, I didn't get the "sweeeeet, awesome ride!!" feeling today that I've been getting lately, but they can't all be like that. 

With lots more riding I've developed a lot more "feel" for any tension in the horse. My coach rolls her eyes at me for thinking little "nothings" are a big deal. And I do need to learn to just ride through stuff, but after some bolting and major spooking falls very early in my riding days, my self-preservation, defensive instincts are VERY strong. (Strong enough that I'm not sure why I chose THIS sport some days, haha.) I think mostly it's a good thing, but heaven help me if I'm ever taking lessons on an ACTUALLY spooky horse.

Friday, April 20, 2018

I had another lesson today, and my coach wasn't kidding last time when she said we'd start getting into more advanced stuff. We did some canter work, including some flying changes across the diagonal. This horse and I haven't been doing the greatest flying changes, exactly, but they're starting to improve. Part of the initial problem was stiffness and a lack of fitness on the horse's part, but she's started getting much more fit and balanced in the canter, and is looking and feeling great, so we're going to be incorporating more work like this as her and my fitness progress.

Our changes weren't going very smoothly, as I'm still not used to them and find them kind of rough. Unfortunately I exacerbate the problem by anticipating it being uncomfortable, and bracing my body, while also trying to turn her too sharply to force the change and get it over with. Oh boy! So for experiment's sake, my coach had me also go across the diagonal but try to stay on the same lead and proceed in counter canter. Well! I got much nicer, smoother flying changes when I didn't even want them. *facepalm* But it was a great lesson in asking more subtly and just LETTING them happen when I DO ask for them!!

Trying to maintain counter canter itself was a crazy mindgame. Well, mind-and-body game. I haven't practiced it in a year and a half, and the ring we're riding in right now is REALLY small so it's extra challenging to maintain it in such a tight space. But, trying to maintain outside flexion while turning to the inside?? Bwuhhhhh. My muscle memory betrayed me over and over and I would either accidentally ask for a change, or end up holding her too tightly and fall into trot. Definitely going to need to practice this! It's good to have a new thing to be baffled by, though. Haaa.

Otherwise things felt and, apparently, looked quite good. The only major feedback was really to move my hips more but my shoulders less when I post. So, keep my shoulders in kind of the same "space bubble" but have my hips come forward and back. "Imagine you're trying to push your hips towards your hands so you can super subtly do up your fly and hope no one notices!" That bit of advice totally did it. In riding, wording is sometimes everything.

Oh, and the shoulder. Always, the shoulder. That was the other thing. It's always my other thing. ;)

After the ride, three of us were standing around talking by M's stall and she had her head hanging out into the hallway, with her lower lip hanging loose and a soft eye. I kept scratching under her jaw and she was really into it, and her lip kept flapping around. She's not a super social horse, so it's nice when she's in a friendly mood and just wants to hang out with people and get some attention. <3

Thursday, April 19, 2018

After my post on Tuesday, April 11, I had a lesson the next day, and then... my back spasmed a bunch and I didn't ride for nearly another week. But, it seems better now, so that's good!

My first lesson after my coach got back from her trip (the lesson on the 12th) was a bit rough for me as a couple things changed. I tried a different saddle, and that's often a bit of an adjustment once you've gotten used to a different one, especially something as specialized as a dressage saddle. Also, I think my back was starting to feel a bit strained by that day, although it wasn't doing anything specifically bad or anything. Also, turns out I'd kind of been letting the horse just... plod along. What felt like nice relaxed movement to me (which, granted, it was) was a bit too relaxed, so we spent the lesson getting me to try to make her MOVE more! So my thoughts of my first lesson being all "Oooooo look how GOOD I got while you were gone!" weren't quite on the money. ;) Of course, I'd much rather have a productive lesson anyhow, which this was, so I'm not actually complaining.

The next day, my back started going NOPE, so I did do the morning chores, but I didn't ride. By the next day it had been bad enough that I skipped doing the stalls, and definitely didn't ride. Then I had the weekend off chores, and decided not to ride then either.

Monday I MEANT to ride, but instead I couldn't get up the first hill into the driveway, as there was thick wet snow everywhere. I tried to back down it and wound up stuck off to one side of the driveway. Yay. I called the groundskeeper and he was able/willing to come out with a tow rope and pull me out. Phew!! I made a snowman while I waited. The car came out easily on the first try, so that was a relief! By the time I got up to the barn, I was over an hour later than I meant to be, and the horses were all WOUND. UP. So I got them fed and out and did everything BUT ride. No time and not worth it!! I was so happy to get out of there and home after all that, I don't think you could have PAID me to stay up there longer or head back up.

I had a nice ride on my own on Tuesday, back in the dressage saddle. Worked on something we had tried a couple of times in the previous lesson, which was to spiral in on a canter circle until she was very collected, and then ask for a walk transition. It went quite well. She's definitely MUCH stronger, and so am I!

She did a couple of dumb things with popping her head up and tugging the reins, so it was back in the bungee reins again for yesterday's lesson! She was NOT happy about it, but she did everything I asked for.

That lesson (which was yesterday) was the ego boosting praise-heavy lesson I had kind of hoped for, haha. I was really in a good groove and even though M was a bit stiff, and kept moving her head around to test the bungee reins, I was riding well and my coach was noticing and liking the changes. My seat looks great, my alignment is good, I'm MUCH stronger and no longer have a "weak side." I still need to work to turn my left shoulder more when I'm going that direction, but it's nowhere near as bad as it used to be. She also said, "Every time I go to tell you to fix something today, you fix it yourself before I can say anything!" So my awareness and feel have gotten drastically better too.

Funny thing: when I rode alone on Tuesday, my canter to the left was smooth and I sat it well, but my canter to the right was stiff. In my lesson, I cantered to the left first and felt stiff, then when I cantered to the right I was about to say "See, I'm much better this direction" before I realized that I was on the "bad" side but riding it better than the "good" side!!

She was really happy with my progress and said now that I'm stronger and more even and able to isolate my aids, we can start doing more advanced work. Cool!!!!

She also said my sitting trot is "a lot better than most people's" and that my main problem now is that my hands want to come up and bounce around. I need to relax, keep that tailbone tucked, and also keep my hands low and wide.

More good things were said, about my riding and about the conditioning of the horse, who apparently is looking better than she has in the last few years. She even has a nice bit of muscle developing along her crest, which she's never had the entire time I've been riding her.

This morning I tried the other saddle again, except this time it had knee blocks in place, I didn't use the puffy pink half pad, and I put my stirrups up one hole from last time. And it actually felt great! I had no problems whatsoever in it, and my position felt really good. If my coach wants me to keep going in this one instead of using her personal saddle (totally understandable!!) I'm okay with that.

My canter was actually really good BOTH ways today! Wow! I felt really plugged in today, and I don't know if it was the saddle, but it didn't hurt at least. I counted her strides on each circle, between letters on the long side... Half of a large circle one way was 11 strides, and the other way it was 12. Consistently. Interesting. So, her stride on the right lead is longer than her stride on the left. Something to keep in mind to continue conditioning her as evenly as possible. Need to push her out more to the left.

A side benefit of counting the strides: it really helped my canter! My seat was deep and in tune, I was focused on an outcome so I was more inclined to keep her moving forward well and consistently. Definitely want to keep that up!

I'm going to try to ride again tomorrow either in the morning, or in the afternoon in a lesson. Will see how things go! Feeling really good this week, though!

Tuesday, April 10, 2018

Ride ride ride ride ride ride ride ride ride!

I'm feeling great about my riding lately. M and I are really clicking more than ever, and she's been absolutely wonderful these past two weeks. She's carrying herself better and has more energy and better responsiveness. I'm also carrying MYself better, and have better energy and responsiveness!

I've put in more concentrated riding in the last week and a half than I think I have... ever. I haven't ridden so much since Pony Club camp! Today is Tuesday. Other than Monday of last week, and this past Saturday, I've ridden every morning since (and including) Sunday, April 1. The rides have been anywhere from 20 to 45 minutes, but have mostly been in the 25 to 35 minute range. So, neither one of us gets worn out, but it's still lots of time to work on things and tone some muscles.

My body feels amazing. My back feels like it's been stretched out very tall and flat. My hips are unlocked and open. My hamstring strength has changed a lot too. I feel like a lot of angles in my body have really opened up in new and better ways. The "shoulders like a lady, hands like a queen, hips like a whore" description of riding posture is starting to really happen. I could still follow more with my lower back, but the kind of supportive softness necessary can only come from increased strength. So, it IS getting there, but I'm understanding now why it's been so difficult for me.

I also feel like I'm riding more quietly than ever, which, now that I'm stronger, translates to riding a lot more effectively. It's amazing how much strength and control it takes to just sit tall and really ride on top of the motion.

Yesterday I did some canter circles, and also did two and a half laps of it each direction! Woohoo! She did break a couple of times but nowhere near as much as she used to.

I've still been leaving off the bungee reins. Her cough has let up, but she's still rounding herself better and hasn't been pulling, so I'm in no hurry to put them back on if she's going so nicely on her own. I took her bridle home and completely stripped it, cleaned and conditioned it, and put it back together. When I did, I let the bit down one hole lower on each side. I've been wanting to try that, as I wondered if some of the tugging comes from her having it so high and feeling like she can't get away from the pressure. She also constantly wants to scratch at the corners of her mouth when the bridle is in. But I also didn't want to second guess my coach! Still, I thought it was worth experimenting with. I've had two rides so far with it lower. It's definitely high enough to be well clear of her teeth, so that's not a worry. She has played with it a bit both times I've put it on her, which she never normally does, but in a good way, not in a get-her-tongue-over-it way. She hasn't been in as big a hurry to scratch her mouth, either. She still does, but today it was like an afterthought instead of something urgent.

I did some no stirrups work yesterday and today towards the end of the ride. Yesterday's was okay, but today's felt great! I did both rising and sitting yesterday, but today I just did sitting. I did a couple of laps each way today, crossing the diagonal frequently. I was sitting good and deep and not bouncing much. I did lots of circles both ways, as they force me to turn my body and balance myself. To the left, I really have to turn my shoulder and torso to stay balanced. To the right, I almost have to lean my body into the turn, which is weird. Probably comes from my right side wanting to shorten up on me.

All in all, feeling much stronger and more sturdily upright, if that makes sense. I'm like a stone column up there -- but, you know, one that can bend when and where it counts.

Not that I want this to actually happen -- I certainly don't and it's not even possible anyhow -- but it would be so interesting to try to ride with my current new muscle memory and riding knowledge... with the body I had when I first started back at this. I think it would really demonstrate how much hard work and conditioning has been going into my riding. It'll be three years back at it, this June or July. So very different from where I began! Who knew.

One more note about today: the caretaker of the property came in to the ring right after I'd mounted, and we chatted a bit while I rode. I think the distraction actually helped because I rode pretty effortlessly and felt bold and in control. Maybe a little part of me likes an audience of someone who isn't a more accomplished rider? Does part of me like showing off, just a *little* bit? If so that's probably a good thing.

Thursday, April 5, 2018

This morning I rode for about 35 minutes. Which is actually on the longer side for me lately; a lot of my rides have just been 25 minutes. Trying to take a BIT more time while I'm up there anyhow!

Did lots of transitions. The canter continues to improve for both of us. I did sort of a trot serpentine with a 15m canter circle at each end and a 20m circle at the half way point down each side, but I varied some of it so the places for the transitions wouldn't be as predictable for her.

I continue to get stronger supportive seat muscles. It's amazing what a difference it makes when I remember to use the backs/bottoms of my thighs to support me. Everything else starts to click, plus it cushions my ride without gripping or tensing. It's a good feeling and I want to do as much as I can to strengthen those muscles before the horses go back. Still really enjoying the change of saddle, even though it is a bit of a head trip and I feel like I have to ride very differently in it.

One of my favourite parts of today's ride was, just towards the end, doing a nice forward trot on a long rein and feeling her stretch down and really move through her whole back and whole body. She wasn't nearly as cough-y today, either, so that meant less brace in both of us. Less snot in her nose. So, good! Still no bungee reins but she's been very good and light and moving better anyhow, so they've maybe done their job for now.

I did a tiny bit of trot with no stirrups towards the end of the ride, but something was clicking like crazy, a buckle or something, and it was distracting/concerning me so I walked her out and hopped off. Didn't find whatever it was, though.

I can feel a bit of imbalance in my hips that I don't think was as pronounced in the previous saddle -- but it is ME and not the saddle! I think it's at least partly caused by my right side wanting to shorten on me. Just need to keep working on staying LONG on that side.

The thigh-rolling test was A+ again today. Perfect thigh position flat against the saddle. That was cool.

I also feel like I'm finding a more effective way to close my thighs that doesn't pop me up out of the saddle on downwards transitions. It seems to come from a place higher up than where I was squeezing before. Closer to those supportive muscles I'm trying to develop.

Still lots to do to work on staying loooooonnnnnngggg at all times. But, it's coming!

I also need to sit deep and stop leaning and pumping to get her up into canter. I need to sit deep, ask, and instead of trying to SHOVE her into it, just stay still and back up my outside leg cue with my whip. Why is sitting still and doing as little as possible so hard?

I'm also noticing a distinction in how I use my lower leg to move the horse over vs. how I ask for speed. Going to use more of the flat of my calf for "over," and more of my ankle for "go," I think. It's a distinction that makes sense to me and seems to make sense to the horse.

Cute moment from after the ride: I gave her a very small handful of her new grain that she likes, as a treat, then started blanketing her. She kept stretching her neck and head down and around on this funny angle and looking at me kind of sideways with a lip nudge to say "MORE please!" and it was ADORABLE. I never give her treats so it must have been pretty exciting for her. I'll have to be careful though because she was SUCH a mooch and I could see it getting to be a "thing" very quickly.

As much as I like her I've never felt a super strong "bond" with her but that's definitely changed over the course of this winter, and I think it's mutual. She seems interested in me instead of just indifferent, and we both seem nice and at ease with each other. It's a good feeling. I'll miss her a lot once they go back home, even though I'll still see and ride her once or twice a week. It's not going to be the same as her being "my" horse for the winter.

Wednesday, April 4, 2018

Thighs: blocking, bracing, supportive

I don't know the actual muscle names. I do know that there are three different general "feels" to how I'm using my thigh muscles when I ride. And that unintentionally mixing these up leads to tensions/imbalances, etc.

Blocking: This is using the inside of my thighs to bring in the knees and slow the shoulders of the horse. This also describes a stillness in the bottoms/backs of my thighs that slows motion. Either of these, or some combination, can slow the gait, cause a downwards transition, or even a halt. Bringing in the knees is most effective in the trot, to maintain the gait but slow the shoulders. It seems less effective for a downwards transition or halt, and that's where the stillness rather than the squeezing feeling helps more.

Bracing: This is when I use the muscles that would normally pop me into half seat or two point, but they tend to engage when I'm nervous in a type of defensive position. Not so desirable in dressage. Instead of supporting me in a way that absorbs and cushions the motion, this use of my thighs and lower legs braces against the motion and pops me above it. Again, good in certain applications, but not what I'm trying to currently develop. I tend to brace when I concentrate, or when I feel nervous or uncomfortable, or sense the horse is out of balance, or rushing, or on the forehand, etc. While it isn't necessarily a bad instinct it's one that I would like to have come into play a lot less often.

Supportive: This is the good stuff, right here! By lifting the front of my pelvis slightly and thinking of the backs/bottoms of my thighs as an extension of my seat, and using them in a downwards way -- rather than an inwards way -- I follow better and get wonderful, cushioned, soft, following, balanced support. There is no gripping; there is a constant self-adjusting self-balancing set of shocks in my seat when these are engaged. This stabilizes me in sitting trot and in canter, without creating stiffness or tension. My seat is deep and tall and follows well when I engage these muscles. I think these are probably the most important muscles for me to develop right now to further the development of my dressage seat.

Anyhoo, mini-article aside, here's where things are at lately. I've gotten in a number of short rides, anywhere from 20 minutes to 40 minutes, since my last entry. I had been using bungee reins over the poll and clipped to the girth to encourage more softness, roundness, and less heaviness in the bridle from M, but the last time I used them she had a pretty good coughing fit at the canter and I felt really bad for her being unintentionally punished for stretching down. She's had a snotty nose since, and some big coughs, so I've left them off this week. She's actually going very well without them -- maybe they were a good reminder at least? -- and is doing less tuggy leany stuff into my hands.

I've been working daily on sitting trot, and would say I'm probably doing 30-40% of my trotting sitting. Oof! Poor M, but I am getting MUCH better! I had been having trouble keeping my pelvis at the correct angle without rounding my upper body down and lifting my hands. But when I started using the backs of my thighs again properly the other day, it made a huge difference and I didn't feel as disorganized. There is definitely room for improvement! But I HAVE improved!

I've found that keeping my hands wider has helped with a softer hand on the reins at both sitting trot and canter. I'm not sure what it is exactly, but it feels good. Wider = still connected but softer, lighter, more following. I feel like I still have control and connection but I can move more. The contact feels more alive and active that way instead of like a wall.

This change of saddle has actually been very, very good for me. I can't cheat in it -- or at least not very easily! It also puts my leg back under me where it needs to be. I don't have to try to fight with a forward stirrup bar. Even though the AP saddle I was using wasn't nearly as bad as some for that, it still wasn't aligned like this dressage saddle! My leg is back under me and, I was pleased to discover yesterday, my thigh is flat against the saddle and couldn't be turned more correctly if I tried. (I did try, by first pulling my whole leg off the saddle, pushing my heels out wide, letting my legs fall back, then also grabbing the muscles on the backs of my thighs and pulling them out and off the saddle. They were as turned as they could be and didn't move at all when I did this! Woohoo!!!) I'm riding with a longer stirrup than I ever have -- they're more like shelves for my feet to rest on than anything else -- but it IS what this saddle calls for, and it actually feels good and stable (well, most of the time). I'm using the backs of my thighs to support me, more than that ankle drop that is so necessary to a forward seat. My body is having to readjust itself and learn some new muscle memory, and gain strength, but it's all good for me and it IS starting to click. I think gaining the right strength and position for this saddle will actually help me in all disciplines. Once my leg WANTS to be further back I know it will make Lauren happy if I go back for more lessons with her at any point. :)

The horses go back very soon. While the morning chores sometimes feel like a bit much, some days, I'm going to miss it a lot. It's been such a nice routine to start my day. And I feel like I've gotten to know all of them much better. I'll miss M most of all as she's been "my" horse for the winter. It's been so interesting to be (almost) the only rider for one horse for an extended period of time. We've certainly both learned a lot from each other and have developed a lot of feel for what the other's intentions are. And it's been nice to know how to "fix" things too. For example, I've accidentally taught her that when I shorten my reins, it's time to speed up. Well, she's not wrong! Ooops! So today I started to pick them up occasionally at the walk... and NOT ask her for anything more, then go long again. Got to keep them on their toes!

Also, she's been feeling a lot better lately. More forward, more energy. She tends to start off pokey but once she's thoroughly warmed up, I have to slow her down at least as much as I have to speed her up. She looks great, too. More muscle on her, and only just a slight amount of ribbiness, but not too much. She looks fit and healthy and younger than she did in the fall. She feels MUCH better in even just the last two weeks, at the canter. The weird choppy, hoppy canter to the left is gone and she's much more normal. (I always canter her to the right first as that's her better side and it helps get the stiffness out.) It probably helps that I've been a lot more relaxed too. My nerves come and go but I do feel stronger, and more stable and capable, lately. I'm sad they're leaving soon -- feel like I'm just starting to get the hang of some things! -- but I think that's always how it is in riding.